My Not So Secret Love Affair

Is there anything worse than an urgent blog craving without a single interesting thought to explore? (Er, well maybe world hunger, taxes, the stomach flu, canine obesity - but uninspired blog cravings are right up there and you know it) Perhaps I'll simply spend my coffee-sipping-time reconnecting with my not-so-secret-lover - Napster. Napster and I go WAY back. We met in college and golly, we sure could waste the hours, he and I. He was forbidden - the bad boy on the block - and I loved him all the more deeply for it. Others wooed me, sure! There was a time I even strayed, drawn to the glitzy Itunes like a moth to a hot blue flame. Napster never judged me, never stopped waiting for my return. Return I did and this morning we rendezvous once more. Because all great love affairs need spice, I'm going to click "Shuffle."


Oh, you're still here? Boy, you're nosey. Fine - I'll leave you the soundtrack to our meeting but you're pushing it. My ten song shuffle list (with one or two skips for songs I have no recollection of downloading and have never heard - I think they were implanted by Itunes, trying to woo me back), and I even included links to soundclips because I know how lazy you are (you will have click the song title and press play - I can't do everything for you)

1. Still Holding On to You - Martina McBride/Clint Black
This song makes me laugh now, because I SOOO remember singing and crying to the lyrics in highschool, probably over some stupid boy who now sacks groceries at Sak and Save. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

2. Hole in My Soul - Aerosmith
I still lovingly place Aerosmith on my top three greatest bands list. I LOVED this album and I adore this song.

3. Hate Me - Blue October
This song is a heartgrabber and its genius.

4. Mr. Brightside - The Killers
Who doesn't love The Killers?

5. Oceans & Streams - The Black Keys
When this song popped up I felt a little thrill. One of my favorites.

6. DayDreams About Night Things - Ronnie Milsap
I love me some Ronnie Milsap. I'm reminded this morning of a lunch with Scott and Stacey when Ronnie's "Stranger in My House" started playing. The lyric is "There's a stranger in my house, somebody here that I can't see." Scott very innocently said, "Well, of course he can't see anyone. He's blind." I bursted out laughing but I swear Scott never cracked a smile.

7. Best of You - Foo Fighters
Dave Grohl makes my heart flip flop and I fantasize that he's singing this song to me and then we make out. Just kidding about the makeout part. No I'm not.

8. Ironic - Alanis Morissette
Ironic or Iconic? If I could invest my money in a song that would still be relevant in 100 years, it would be this one.

9. Hysteria - Muse
I love singing this song at the top of my lungs in the car.

10. Wake the Sun - The Matches
Anthem material! Fell in love with this song the moment I heard the first note.

Chicken Burglars

Crime finally found my peaceful little town. It all started with graffiti on the railroad control box. "Southside," someone had scribbled, which made Sid and I chuckle because the railroad tracks run North and South, dividing the town into East and West. "Morons," we muttered with smug faces as we crossed the tracks.

Yesterday, I walked outside to greet Sid, who had been tinkering all day in the garage. First thing he says, "I'm glad I taught you to operate the new pistol - you might need to use it." I laughed, thinking he meant a wild coyote was on the loose or an obnoxious neighbor had said something to tick him off. Apparently, however, he was informed that four males in a black pickup truck are believed to be responsible for kicking in the doors of empty (thank goodness) homes and robbing them blind. It started in the tiny town East of us (where some gorgeous new ginormous homes were recently constructed) and they've begun to work their way into my quiet little town. Since Sid and I are both home during most days, robbing us would be a fatal mistake, but I digress.

I'm reminded of a lazy teenage summer afternoon, wasting the entire day on the sofa with a bag of chips and Saved by the Bell reruns, when the phone rang.

Me: (picks up ringing phone with orange Cheetos hands) Hello?
Neighbor: Hi hun. Just wanted to let you know that we've had some chicken burglars in the area.
Me: (thinking, "Oooookay. We don't own any chickens, lady.") Um....okay?
Neighbor: Be sure to tell your parents, okay? And lock your doors!
Me: (but chickens live outside...if I OWNED chickens, wouldn't the burglar just open the gate and take them?) Thanks!

I dial my Mom.

Me: Hey! Lois just called and wanted me to tell you some chicken burglars are on the loose.
Mom: What?!? That doesn't make any sense.
Me: No kidding. I was polite, though. Don't worry.
Mom: Chicken burglars....
Me: She said to lock the doors.
Mom: OH! KICK IN burglars! (snorting laughter for ten minutes)
Mom: Go lock the doors!

Short Story Sunday

Sid selected the story this week, written in the first grade, because reading it out loud makes us laugh! For the record, we never took a trip in a hot air balloon nor was there even the mere mention of such an idea. My favorite element of this riveting tale is the dialogue between mother and daughter and sister and brother. I sure had a tendency to cut the story off just went things started to get interesting, don't you think?

The Terrific Adventure
By: Leigh
Illustrated By: Leigh
Age: 6 or 7

Leigh Leigh Potter

I want to be a twelve year old wizard and live at Hogwarts. I want my very own wand and giant dusty magic books, purchased from a day of shopping in Diagon Alley. I want to wear smart circle glasses and robes that hide all my figure flaws and I want Harry, Ron and Hermione to be my bffs. I want an ancient four poster bed with warm heavy covers and a common room with wingback chairs and a roaring fire surrounded by giggling friends playing wizard chess. I want a giant feast every Halloween with pumpkin juice and and a ceiling of stars and an owl that brings my mail to me. I want to look into the warm, twinkling eyes of Professor Dumbledore and hear his voice when he comforts me with wise words like, "It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live, my dear Leigh, " or "It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends." I want to give Moaning Myrtle a giant hug and tell her it's time to quit crying and move on already. I want to feel the air on my skin as I soar amongst the clouds on my Nimbus 2000 and high-five Fred and George Weasley when I catch the golden snitch. I want to travel the world with floo powder and wander the halls in my invisibility cloak while the rest of the world slumbers. I want to place the old battered sorting hat on my head and hear it whisper, "Gryffindor!" Harry Potter IS real, right? RIGHT?

Sigh.

Short Story Sunday

I wrote this thrilling tale when I was 8. Unfortunately, there are no illustrations this week (except for a tiny random heart in the title). Apparently, my active imagination drew a blank when it came to character names. Sam and Deena are my stepbrother and sister!

The Man That Went to New Mexico
By Leigh
(retyped, with grammar and spelling intact)

The man that went to Mexico had a name. It is Sam. We call him Fantastic Sam. Fantastic Sam went to New Mexico. When he came back he told us the story. I will tell you and you tell your friends. Well the story will begin now.

Sam wanted to take a vacation. He had been all around the world, but there was one place he had never been to before. It was called New Mexico. So he packed his bags and put them in the Greatest Umbrasy Car. The Greatest Umbrasy Car is something he had invented. He got in the car and went to New Mexico.

In New Mexico he learned a new dance called the Rom Rom Party. That was a dance that was made up by Jhon F. Kenedy. Sam saw his girlfriend and asked her to dance. She said as nice as she could, sure!! Sam started to blush. His face turned to a bright red, and he said, "Thanks!" The girls name was Dena. Dena had brown hair. She had a gown of pink on. She said, "You look good tonight." He said, "Thanks!!" They danced all night long.

The next day it was time for him to go. He said by to everyone and left.

THE END

The Return of the Dancing Queen

What's that? An encore of Dancing Queen, you ask? Well, of course!

Confessions of a Chubby Mrs. Pee

Pssst! I need to tell you a secret. Something has been "weighing" on me for quite sometime but I haven't had the nerve to tell you. Let's be completely honest with one another, shall we?

I fell off the wagon.

You know how a few months ago, I began blogging about my "diet makeover" and I promised to check in with my progress now and then? And before we all knew it, 4 or 5 months had passed and I'd lost 30 pounds and we were all proud of my HUGE (pardon the pun) accomplishment? You all showered me with praise and gifts and threw parties in my honor? Remember? No? Oh right, there were no parties or presents, but there was lots and lots of praise and encouragement. (parties and presents welcome)

Well, you know that time of year when all bets are off? And we stuff our fat faces with turkey and carbs and pumpkin pie? And we drink buckets and buckets of eggnog and hot cocoa? And when we'd normally just take one [fill in the blank] from the serving table, we soothe our guilt with the infamous "it's the holidays" excuse and shove another [fill in the blank] down our throats? And you know how this "most wonderful time of the year" lasts from November through the New Year? And let us not forget my vacation to New York City right before Christmas, and we all know diets are illegal on vacations. And remember how NYC is the "city that never sleeps?" Well, if you never sleep, guess what? You eat more! Are you following me, friends?

Forgive me readers, for I have sinned. This is my confession:

-Before falling off the wagon, I'd lost 33 pounds
-Over the past 12 weeks, I've gained 5 pounds (net loss = 28 pounds)
-Before falling off the wagon, I walked 4 or 5 times per week, usually 3 miles in 45 minutes.
-In the past month, I walk 2 times per week at most, some weeks I don't walk at all.

Can you find in your skinny little hearts to be my friend anyway? Deep down, I know this was a silly little detour on a long-term journey to becoming the healthiest version of myself. Deep down, my body has ferociously craved the nutrition and exercise it had grown so accustomed to. Deep down, I know I'll be ridiculously fabulous by my 29th birthday. But I need a slap in the face, a jump start and I think this confession will be just the ticket.

I'll check back in next Monday and let you know how things are going!

Short Story Sunday

By popular demand (two people), it is my greatest pleasure and honor to present Short Story Sunday, with Leigh Leigh.

The First Halloween
By Leigh
Illustrated by Leigh
(retyped, with grammar and spelling intact)

Once upon a time there was a witch who lived long ago. and she killed to much and she liked a skeleton named Franke. He was cute. She liked to make brews every day. The witch liked the skeleton so verey much but one day the skeleton killed the witch and he lived very happy and one day he felt alone so he cryed. The witch came back to life and tryed to kill the skeleton but he was so powerfel he wold not die and she was so mad! She died.

Thank you. Thank you.

This was one of - if not THE - first creative short story I wrote in school, unprompted and completely on my own. I believe I was 6, maybe 7. It is perhaps the tamest and shortest story I've ever written, so get ready for some hilarious Sundays! I was a very strange child.

The Dancing Queen and Her Giggly Brother

"You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life. See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen"

Sid and I headed to Houston for the weekend so we could sit proudly in the audience at Makenzie's first dance recital. Nana called on the way and said Makenzie was wondering when on earth we were going to finally get there! We "finally" arrived, 24 hours before the big performance, and as always got the biggest running-as-fast-as-she-can-and-and-then-jumping-into-your-arms hug from our girl and the playing began!

Some trip highlights:

1. While Sid finished a few minor details on Makenzie and Ryan's new swing set (Randy was almost done before he had to go out of town for work), Makenzie practiced her sweet moves for Leigh Leigh and Nana. She got a huge kick out of our announcements - "introducing, the one, the only, dance queen- MAKENZIE!"

2. It didn't take long for the Easy Bake Oven to make an appearance. Makenzie and I sat down to make the scrumptious (aka disgusting) cake mix that Nana brought her. Halfway through the mixing, she decided the cake would be for Sid for helping build her swingset AND for his belated birthday. Since we didn't have any presents for Sid, she insisted on wrapping a couple bags of candy her Noni (aka Cindy's Mom, Donna) had sent to celebrate her first recital. When Sid walked in, we all yelled, "Surprise!" and sang a combination of "Happy Birthday" and "Thank you for helping build my swingset!" and we even had candles for him to blow out. Makenzie insisted that we eat the cake, but wouldn't you know it? After one bite, we were just too full to finish. (can you say N-A-S-T-Y!)

3. As always, I forget 90% of the hilarious things Ken Ken says, things that I swear I won't forget. Here are a few of my favorites that I remember:

[Ryan drops bottle on dirty Double Dave's Pizza floor]
Leigh: Cindy, want me to take that to the bathroom to wash it?
Makenzie: Leigh Leigh, you're always doing everything! (said kind of like, "Leigh Leigh, can't you just sit there and eat your pizza and let Momma handle it?")

Makenzie: Siddy, you look like Duchess! (her black Labrador)
Siddy: Oh!...okay. How come?
Makenzie: Your face looks like a puppy dog!

Leigh: How are you feeling? Are you sick?
Makenzie: No, my head hurts but I'm not sick. It's from all of you talking so much.

4. Ryan is the happiest baby you've ever seen. He starts to cry and then decides he'd rather giggle. He loves to be held and cuddled and talked to and he adores his big sister.


5. Of course, the recital was our biggest highlight! Lucky readers that you are, I have footage! Her first performance was the jazz routine, followed by ballet (Leigh Leigh tried really hard not to boo hoo like a baby - just wait until you see the video!). As I mentioned, Ken Ken was a bit feverish on Saturday but insisted she wasn't sick. By Sunday, she was running a fever. She still insisted that she was okay, but after waiting 3 hours to perform (I won't even begin to blog about THAT), she had chills and was burning up. Did she ever once say she wanted to go home? Did she even CONSIDER not dancing? NO WAY! When it was her team's turn, she was ready to rock it - and she certainly did! (She was officially diagnosed with strep throat this morning.)

Picture slideshow is on it's way! (A girl has to take a blogging break to eat lunch!)